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The Great Indian Management Course

PUNCHY TANTRAS

It’s a fine sunny day in the forest, and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along came a fox, out on a walk.

Fox : “Do you know the time? My watch is broken.”

Lion: “Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you.”

Fox : “Hmm. But it’s a very complicated mechanism, and your great claws might destroy it.”

Lion: “Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed!”

Fox : “That’s ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with big claws cannot fix complicated watches.”

Lion: “Sure they could. Give it to me and it will be fixed.”

The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he came back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in the sun, looking very pleased with himself.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun.

Wolf: “Can I come and watch TV tonight with you? Mine is broken.”

Lion: “Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you.”

Wolf: “You don’t expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws could fix a complicated TV.”

Lion: “No problem. Do you want to try it?”

The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed.

Scene: Inside the lion’s cave.

In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments.

In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.

Lesson

IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY A SUPERVISOR IS FAMOUS, LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.

In the context of the working world:

IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY SOMEONE UNDESERVED IS PROMOTED,LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.

Contributed by Madhumita Ghosh

Posted under Management Resources/ HR

Job seekers in India, need to use rejection as a positive feed back mechanism

Lima Sehgal

However seasoned, no one can get immune to the aches and pains of the job hunting process.

What we tend to do is get into a mindset of either aggression or denial rather than admit the pain of the process. Result is poor results.

Rejection, being an integral part of the job hunt, makes us go through various ego protection exercises -

Me great –find me.

Very popular with freshers with firang education and those who qualify from institutions which charge exorbitant fees. Also popular with senior level people. But waiting is a dubious job hunting strategy.

The golden shortlist of placement firms.

This minimizes the pain of rejection. Placement firms say no or, at worse, ignore you if they cannot cater to you. Small list less pain, big list more pain. So, reduce the number of nos from placement companies by keeping the list small and then continue to flog a dead horse. Then blame it for not responding properly. The blame game is quite popular.

Net the internet.

There is definitely more to fishing than dipping a net in the ocean. Job hunting on the internet is the ultimate in wishful thinking. I suspect that the popularity lies in the anonymity. If you can’t get a job there is no human to blame which is great for the ego but not too great for results.

The by- pass.

If all the above mentioned exercises fail then one concludes that all systems are big no – nos and the only recourse is to go to the companies direct. If one reaches such a stage then a coronary by-pass is a safer option. Even Safer if you kiss your career good bye.

All said and done job hunting is always about – A thousand no’s for a single yes. Let us just be brave and swallow the bitter pills.

Copyright © 2011, Jobnet magazine, issue 179

Republication or dissemination of the contents of this article are expressly prohibited without the written consent of the publishers of Jobnet magazine

Posted under Articles by Lima Sehgal

TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS

You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.

INFOSYS ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows
You put both of them on the bench
And hire another to do the job.

TCS ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows
You tell them that only one will go to onsite.
You ask both of them to fight for the only H1B Visa.
Both of them die after fighting.

HCL ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows
You milk them only for 24 hours on just 7 days a week.
They run away.

CTS Economics

You have 2 cows
You train them for two months on how to milk themselves. Then u ask them to pull bullock carts.

SATYAM ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows.
One is intelligent one is dumb.
You send the dumb cow to onsite making the intelligent cow frustated.
Intelligent cow resigns out of frustration and dumb cow
is laid off by the client

WIPRO ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows
You hire one bull
You start milking the bull and Start ploughing the field with the cows…..Applying Thought

PATNI ECONOMICS

You have 2 cows
You don’t hire any bull and ask them to multiply themselves

IBM ECONOMICS

You have one cow you feed it well
But you try to get all those stuff ie not just milk but also butter, cream, curd and rasmalai in one shot

MICROSOFT ECONOMICS

You have a very popular fat cow the cow has a very thin leg it eats a lot but when it comes to milking the cow crashes down

NIIT ECONOMICS

You lure a group of cows how to be milked – one among them gets milked
The rest end up teaching another group of cows how to get milked

HP ECONOMICS

You have one cow you feed it well but you try to INVENT new things out of it. Not only milk but hot coffee, fruit juice and all other things you can think of !!!!!

corporate economics

Posted under Research by Jobnet