The Indian Job-seeker’s Buttocks

The swivel chair ? Yes the movies did catch on and we have those pictures about success.

The buttocks are the ultimate definition of job success.

Indians have a strong conviction that the buttocks are the defining criteria for future success.

The youth needs hard seats to develop brains for success. Schools and all other educational institutions agree to its role in future success.

As a mother, I have checked the availability of water coolers, the quality of teachers, the accreditation, the lab facilities, the sports facilities, academic facilities, the toilets, hostels rooms etc- And always the Buttock- Rest offered by an institution.

The hardness of the buttock- rest is directly proportional to the success of a student .

All Indian schools always believed in the Buttocks Theory of Education.

Once upon a time corporal punishment was quite the in thing and one got caned on the buttocks to improve performance.Even if it did not work for some, it did wok for some others- so I am told.

But because of statistical problems( I must explain that the the proliferation of idiots who could not be improved and the save the forest naturalists who wanted to reduce the cutting of wood which went into the cane industry, thereby killing our forest,s which was happening because of the unnatural number of idiots being born in that era) all led to the government banning corporal punishment in schools.

The Educationists and the Politicians did much mud flinging but luckily the Parliament passed it.

To counteract this crisis the government as well as the private education authorities advocated a new educational policy of ‘the hard bum education plan’ to help improve the quality of education.

Finally the true test of success would be the swivel chair with a soft seat. If you feel soft on the bum while working that means you are the boss -you have arrived.

Somehow education is still a primary problem.We must outlive the brochures that lure us to a seat which promises a softer future for the buttocks.Employment just happens to the bastard baby that lands up in your lap.

Unfair but real.

The unemployed job seekers who got the so called best of education are the ones who suffer the most. The quantum of suffering being directly proportional to the fees.And the Bum

But the Butt still hurts

Hey – that calls for some justice- but a cushion would help too

Copyright © 2014, Lima Sehgal
Republication or dissemination of the contents of this article are expressly prohibited without the written consent of the publishers of Jobnet magazine & the Author

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *